Originally seen on Migraine Musings, Written by Lois Clauss, Presented by Chronic Migraine Awareness, Inc.

A migraine giveth and it taketh away.  It giveth you pain beyond your wildest dreams and taketh away your life, leaving you with no dreams.

A recent new medication, Aimovig, started with my first injection July 24th and it changed my life.  It initially changed my life by giving me a peak back at it.  The first month I had approximately three weeks of relief and then it came crashing back the weekend before my next injection.  The second  month gave me almost a full month of relief but then come September I received no relief, and it seemed like even more pain.  What I have come to realize is that I am back to square one of learning how to deal with migraine disease. It is amazing how fast you can forget but when you have the pain day in and day out, it gets to be part of your daily life and you cope, overcome, give up, do whatever daily because it is the same.  But when you actually get to experience days with low pain levels down to a 1-2, which as a pain survivor feels almost normal.  Then they come rushing back and controlling your every move, you have to adjust yourself back to your “unnormal” life.  The Chronic Illness Life.  The one without knowing what will come next and just tempering yourself to know what pain level you will be dealing with.  So before the October injection, I requested my dosage to be increased by my Doctor who had freely informed me not to give up if it doesn’t work when I first try it and there is always an increased dosage to try.

Well, unfortunately, double the dosage has done nothing for me yet at this point and I’m almost two weeks into this new injection.  I don’t want to give up so easily but the little bit of life I was given, the glimpse of what it is like to be “normal” is now so hard to get out of my head.  I yearn so much to be that person again.  I know it exists but yet my body keeps it away from me.  Instead, I crawl back into the dark of the chronic world I don’t want to live in.

So migraine giveth and it taketh away.  Not that we want it to.

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